Standing at the Trailhead of Winter

The really, really old furnace I ran an experiment through the month of March. I turned my furnace off on March 1st and kept it off (except for a couple of days when Lovely Beautiful Daughter was staying with me), just using the fireplace to warm the house. I wanted to see if 1) the fireplace would actually heat the house and not just the living room; and 2) what this would do for the gas bill. While my February gas bill wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be, it was still on the high side. The furnace is old and inefficient. It's definitely time for it to retire. What I found was the fireplace will warm the entire house. I got into the routine of turning it on around 6:30 am and letting it run for a couple of hours. The blower chased the chill out of the air quickly, and I found I was very comfortable for several hours after turning the fireplace off. Then I'd turn it back on in early afternoon, letting it run again for a couple of hours. Then around 7 pm I'd tu...

After agonizing deliberation and talking with close friends, I decided to cancel my Nebraska trip. My gut is telling me to stay put, so I'm going to listen and hang out here at home. The cranes will be there next year, and hopefully I will be, too. I have a dear, dear friend in Spain, and she just learned her semester is over. She has been ordered to return home pronto. My college has asked that she self-quarantine once home. Her husband and four-year-old twins are with her. I cannot imagine the worry, fear, and frustration she must be experiencing right now, trying to get everything packed up, to the airport, then home before tomorrow. Another friend just returned from France. She, too, has been asked to self-quarantine. One university here has extended spring break another week, and all students are not to return to campus until further notice. All classes will be online until at least April 12. Another university here has called back all students studying abroad. My tr...

Mornings are still dark when Ado and I get up and go for our first walk of the day. I see the moon move through its phases if the sky is clear. I watch the crows fly overhead, going from their nightly nesting ground to wherever it is they go for the day. I hear the hoot owls calling to one another. Rabbits zip to the shelter of hedges from openly eating in front yards under cover of darkness. The stillness of this time snuggles around me like a favorite sweatshirt pulled on that first cool morning after a long, hot, muggy summer. Speaking of yellow . . . During my walk home from the Coffeehouse last evening, after sitting for several hours with a friend, talking work and writing, my thoughts turned to how not long from now darkness will settle in by 5 pm. My excuse to pull on pj's and hunker down for the evening. One of my most favorite things to do, and it will last right up until April when I'm ready to shed the layers and get back out into the world again. The last f...

Just ten days left of my summer. Ten. Sad face. Tears sliding down my cheeks face. Actually, I'm okay with the summer coming to a close. The two months of working from home were glorious, but it'll be good to get back on campus. The bummer part about going into this fall semester is one of my good friends leaving. He was offered a beautiful deal with a two-year college in Michigan, one he couldn't pass up. It'll definitely be strange without him across the hall from me (though there is whispering of turning his office into a gaming room, complete with mini fridge and microwave). His leaving opened up the opportunity for me to step back into teaching the Honors seminar course. That along with teaching English 102 in hybrid format and coordinating the writing center will be my load. I'm looking forward to all of it, especially the hybrid classes. I've been waiting and waiting for the hybrid classes to get the green light, and they finally did. For the ne...

Angel Baby and I are tired. Exhausted is probably the better word. Between the two of us, we moved a desk that weighs as much as a two-ton truck (really, I know it does) and a china cabinet that's not much less than the two-ton truck. We did the bulk of the move on Tuesday, and every day since has been little stuff followed by cleaning. Today we have one more trip to make -- the unwanted things going to the ReStore and/or Goodwill. We also have the final cleaning. Then done! I've felt the ups and downs all week. Funny Delightful Son no longer comes through the door each afternoon, gives me a salute and says, "Greetings, Commander." My typical response has been, "At ease, Squaddie." I won't get the twenty-minute run-down of his day anymore, and I won't get the jokes and funny comments during dinner. And now that Lovely Beautiful Daughter is in her new place, I won't get my daily fix of hearing about her relationships with the residents where s...

Grades are in, and out of my four classes, only one student is complaining about the course grade. A student who didn't turn most of the assignments in by the due dates. A student who waited until finals week to work on two major papers and the semester-long project. A student who inundated me with emails about how rough her semester has been. When I refused to answer a list of questions she sent last week about concepts that were covered during the semester, she became very upset with me and told me I'm out of touch with the younger generations, I don't listen, and I am the cause of all her stress. I do feel for this student. From what she wrote and the fact that she sent email after email several times during the week, I'm pretty sure she's dealing with mental illness. My hope is she gets help. I sent her series of emails to my boss to clue him into what she said and how she said it. I also encouraged the student to contact my boss to set up a meeting where the ...

A year ago I began moving my life from one house to another. My anger was fueling me, and even now, 365 days later, I still feel some embers glowing. I wonder if I will ever wake up one morning and know the anger is completely gone. I have my doubts. Despite the anger, the year was good. This space the kids and I have called home has been wonderful for us. But changes are happening again. Lovely Beautiful Daughter is returning to school to pursue a degree in elementary education. She has also decided it's time she is on her own, in her own space. She won't be so far away this time and has promised to drop by to visit often. Funny Delightful Son is transferring to Western Illinois. He and I will be driving over in a week to meet with his advisor and check out some apartments. This semester he is finishing up some Gen Eds he put off, and while he wasn't looking forward to any of his classes at the beginning of the semester, he did say not too long ago that the classes a...

Well, the feedback on my first erotic short story was positive. I was told my steamy sex scene was quite brave and forthright. Overall, the readers enjoyed it and thought the story holds a lot of promise. I went in and made the suggested changes, which were definitely what the story needed, and now it's up for another round of critique. Who knows, maybe I have a new career in front of me! I've realized one effect from my sabbatical is how all I think about now is writing. For years I pined for time to write. I tried several times to set aside an hour here or an hour there just for writing. I got up at 4:30 am several years ago, to write before heading off to work. When that fizzled out after two weeks (I absolutely hate, hate, hate getting up before six am), I changed my writing hour to 9:00 pm. That didn't work out because I was always so tired after a long day of work, the kids' activities, and other things going on. The writing was hit and miss for many, many years...

Another 7 inches of snow. Another day of canceled classes. Tomorrow is supposed to bring another dip in the wind chill, the kind of dip that can bring on frostbite within ten minutes to exposed skin, so most likely, we're looking at either another day of canceled classes or a late start. Sigh. I'm really okay with not having to get up this morning. For years and years I've been getting up at 5:30 am, but the last year or so, I've found it more and more difficult to rouse myself when the alarm wakes me up. I set my clock 15 minutes fast just so I can snuggle under the covers for a bit and prepare myself mentally for starting my day. Even after 15 minutes, I don't feel ready to face the world. It's not like I don't get enough sleep. Since going caffeine free, since going soda free, since reducing my refined sugar intake (an area of my life I'm quite pleased with--it's been tough, slow going, but I'm making progress), and since getting back to t...

A new year. A, for the most part, clean slate to work with. What to do with it is almost paralyzingly intimidating. I know for sure I want to get back on the bike and ride, piling up the mileage like never before. I had the same idea for 2013, right after completing the cross-country ride in 2012, but when 2013 actually rolled around, I could feel the desire to get out on a daily basis just wasn't there. Each day I would get up with the intention of going out for a couple of hours, but deep in my core I kept feeling hesitation. Almost like something was gripping my insides and saying, "No, not today. The time isn't right." I listened to that voice, mostly just cycling to work or to the store. On a few occasions I did go out for longer rides, but these were few and far between. Now, I can feel the desire building to get back out, rack up the mileage. I'm glad I listened to whatever was telling me to not cycle, as this allowed me to turn my attention to gardening ...

Things are changing around my house. Good changes. Happy changes. Well, mostly happy. Lovely Beautiful Daughter has moved out, and while I'm happy for her because moving into her first apartment makes her happy, I'm also somewhat sad. I already miss her. Her spark, her creativity, and her cheerfulness always made for fun times. Lovely Beautiful Daughter taught me how important it is to play as an adult, so I try every single day to incorporate some kind of play into my schedule, even if it's only an online word game of some sort. She's been so good for my soul her entire life, and I will never be able to express in words what this young woman means to me. And my boys. Both are changing what seems like by the minute. Funny Delightful Son just got his driver's license. Angel Baby is now taller than I am. All I've been thinking about lately is how it won't be long before both of them are off and on their own, too. My babies are no longer babies. Where did t...

The cycling season is slowly heading towards the day when the bike will be hung up for the winter months. Tree leaves are beginning to show signs of going from green to red or yellow. The corn stands brown and dried, some fields already harvested. Woolly caterpillars inch their way across the roads. The geese gather in strange places: a school yard, a bare soy bean field. And the wind seems to never cease. The calendar shows fall nearing, ready to go shoulder to shoulder against summer and push it out of the way. Summer tries to carry on, with warm days, zinnias still in bloom. Fall has the upper hand, though, bringing earlier sunsets, cooler nights, later sunrises, and morning ground mists. Cycling through these days I feel summer slipping away.

Time for A Clunk Upstairs to get a face lift. As I am not one to do anything in a hurry, the change will occur over a few weeks. My daughter, if she were here, would take over the typing of this post and tell you the change will actually take years. That's how long I've been working on an altered book I started for her over a year and a half ago and still haven't finished. I tend to get sidetracked, go to other projects, dilly-dally. I promised her the book will be finished by the end of the summer. By my calendar, I still have a couple of months. In any case, the blog will change some. I'm finding my focus changing from running and cycling to mostly just cycling, with tangents about the goings on in my life thrown in here and there. Since the Illinois countryside is becoming a larger part of my experiences, I thought the new banner appropriate. I'm sure there will be more pics of the countryside as time goes on. Change is good. Change is inevitable. Change is ...

and breezy days mean fall is on its way. Along with it comes less daylight after arriving home from work, which means less time to ride. I know eventually there'll come a day when I won't be able to go out after work as it will be completely dark. Then it will be time to set the bike up in the garage and pedal away in front of the TV. Could be a good way to get in some movies I haven't seen but would like to. Fall is such a beautiful season. Definitely my favorite. There's just something about the fading away that happens. It's like the earth is saying, "Okay, I'm tired. I need to take a nap." I know the feeling--almost every single day I feel that way around 2 p.m. Each day I look forward to that one more detail that says fall is here. Today it was the leaves scattered along the bike path I take to work. The leaves float into the air as my tires wisk past, then settle back down into another haphazard pattern. In a couple of weeks the leaves will cover...