Standing at the Trailhead of Winter

Tuesday the temps reached 90. Around 5 pm, I realized I am so over the heat of summer. I'm ready for cooler temps and then the cold that will follow. For one reason. Mosquitoes. They've been just awful all summer long. The boys and I can't step outside the back door without an immediate frontal, side, and rear attack. I'm not exaggerating. It doesn't matter what time of day we try to get out. The mosquitoes are waiting and ready to assault us. I've doused myself in more bug spray the last three months than I have my entire life. The poor doggoes end up with mosquitoes on top of mosquitoes vying for space on their snouts. Taking a walk is miserable for them and me. For whatever reason, the mosquito problem seems to be relegated to my side of the village. As soon as we get three blocks away, to the east side of the village, the mosquitoes lessen. And two blocks further they all but disappear. There is a creek about a hundred and fifty yards behind the house, which...

One year ago this past week, I signed on the dotted line and took possession of my little house. The day after I received the key to the back door, we were ordered to stay home. Needing to move my belongings out of the rental Angel Baby and I were living in, I spent the next three days loading boxes filled with stuff into the Jeep and made as many trips as I could each day.  My landlord let me borrow his truck to haul the large pieces of furniture, and with the help of Lovely Beautiful Daughter and Angel Baby, we managed to get everything moved in those three days. It was my fourth time moving in as many years, and I truly hope it will be my final move for the rest of my life. I have not regretted the decision to buy even one nano-second through the last 12 months. If anything, each day I fall deeper and deeper in love with this house that has stood on this plot of land for the last 103 years.  The moment I stepped through the door the day the realtor was hosting an open house...

I am fully in my new home. And every time I walk through the door, I smile and say hello to my new surroundings. I feel so blessed to have had the opportunity to make this move, and I know without a doubt that I made the right decision in leaving a place that was exactly what I needed when I was facing a bad time in my life. I truly believe each step that I've made over the last three years has been guided by a force way bigger than I am or ever will be. It's a bit uncanny how quickly all of this happened. I started looking for a place in December, thinking my lease would be up at the end of May and it might take three or four months to actually find the house I wanted, get the loan in place, and move. I had already spent some time looking at houses online, knowing approximately what my top end needed to be for me to feel comfortable with a mortgage. I knew the small towns I wanted to check out, too, so I spent a couple of days making a list of houses I wanted to look at. I...

The last few weeks I've been chillin'. Mostly just hanging around the house with Ado, enjoying being back in the space the kids and I called home when I decided to move out of my husband's place. The space with the living room windows overlooking the back yard and deck. The space where my three kids and I took a year to figure out where each of us was headed. Lovely Beautiful Daughter decided to go out on her own, and for the last nearly four weeks she's been in Taiwan on a teacher training exchange through the university. Funny Delightful Son moved to live on campus at the university he transferred to after finishing his community college courses. I miss them both, and when I moved back into this space, I could hear echos of them throughout the rooms. The first few days were kind of tough with them not being here, too. But Angel Baby is here with me. He has the entire upstairs all to himself. Three nice-sized rooms, each serving a different purpose. One room is his c...

Another day off work. Still negative temps with serious wind chill. I was a bit surprised the college closed for a second day, but I do understand. I see students wearing shorts -- yes, they wear shorts in January. I would say something snarky here, but I'm truly trying to not think or say hurtful things about others. It's a struggle, let me tell you. Yesterday afternoon, once I learned I would be home today, I didn't read any student work like I should have. Instead, I worked on the piece I've been focused on for the last six months. I'm not ready to talk about it or share any of it yet. I simply want to keep making forward progress. That's not to say I don't share it with others. I do. Like with my friend who I meet every Monday for sharing and feedback. He has seen nearly all of it to date. I trust his judgment. He gives it to me straight, which I need. To see how others might react, others who don't know me, I decided to post a few pages on the c...

Today was the first day I've been able to really sit at my desk and write. And research. And upload the photos from my camera. And transfer the video clips from my GoPro. And even submit two poems to a literary magazine. Being this productive feels really good. To start my day, I made lemon blueberry scones with lemon glaze. While I'm mostly a gluten and grain-free eater, I do like scones. Scratch that. I LOVE scones. Those I will allow myself to eat. Being able to move around a kitchen and bake or cook has been one of the delightful things about being home. Eating refried beans smeared on a tortilla, topped with goat cheese and salsa verde, got pretty old after a month of it. Presently, I'm waiting for the pizza dough I made just a bit ago to rise. While I won't eat the crust, I thought it'd be fun to make homemade pizza for dinner. I've not done that in a very long time. As I wait, I decided to look through the nearly 2000 photos from my camera. These incl...

Just over a week ago, I decided to forego the Southern Tier ride in favor of returning home. I absolutely loved cycling the Pacific coast with the waves crashing against the rocky shoreline, but I wasn't getting as much writing done as I had hoped. I knew going on to the Southern Tier, especially in the role of route leader, would mean even less time to put into the writing, so after long, careful thought, I bowed out. When I made the final decision, I knew without a doubt it was the right decision. Now I am back home. And I've not stopped smiling since seeing Funny Delightful Son sitting in the waiting area of the airport, looking up at me with a smile on his own face as I descended the stairs after getting off the plane. I thought Ado might be mad at me for leaving him for a month, but when I walked up the sidewalk and spoke to him, he put his ears back, wagged his tail, then came to me. He jumped up, putting his paws on my shoulders and nuzzled my face. He returned to ...

Yep. I'm seriously considering leaving the space where I'd built my website and returning to A Clunk Upstairs. I've not totally committed to doing so, and I still have five months left for the year I've paid for to use the space, but I'm realizing I had a pretty good thing going right here. I've never felt totally at home in the other spot, not like I did here. And being here right now feels perfect, like I've slipped my hands into well-worn gloves without tears in the seams or holes at the end of the fingertips. So, I think I'll slowing return and phase out the other space at the same time. To be continued . . . (and this just put a huge smile on my face, which tells me I'm making the right decision).