Thursday, August 14, 2014

Sneaking Around

For much of the summer, Funny Delightful Son's girlfriend, a petite, pretty, quiet though funny when she does speak young lady, came to hang out at our house without her mother's permission. I'm pretty sure her mother had no idea Petite Pretty Girlfriend was sneaking around to visit FDS. They would watch TV or sit at the dining room table and play cards or go for bike rides. It is so completely obvious the two simply enjoy being together and truly like one another.

Last week, after another two weeks of being down due to the mono, Funny Delightful Son began feeling better, and to perk him up a bit, Petite Pretty Girlfriend arrived one afternoon to deliver a care package of fun foods. She wasn't to stay long, but she ended up staying several hours. When she returned home, she was informed she wasn't to see Funny Delightful Son for the rest of the week. Both were crushed.

In the meantime, in an attempt to keep busy, Funny Delightful Son received the components he'd ordered to convert his recurve bow into a bow he could use for fishing. He got everything into place, did some practice shots, then announced he was ready to give it a try with real fish. We made plans for a trip to the I&M Canal where the Asian carp has taken over and is considered a nuisance, and FDS asked if Petite Pretty Girlfriend could go along. I had no objections, but when Other Mother was asked, her response was no. She didn't want her daughter in the same space as Hubby. When she was assured Hubby would not be part of the outing, she relented and allowed PPG to go (Hubby did go--I put my foot down and said enough).

Early Sunday morning, we left for the canal. The day was beautiful. Sunny. Breezy. Perfect for fishing. We arrived at the canal, and within minutes FDS was drawing back his bow to try and shoot a carp. We could see a large group of carp, so it seemed like skewering one would be cake. After his initial shot, though, they all disappeared, apparently going further beneath the surface to avoid becoming impaled. FDS waited and waited for the fish to reappear, but they didn't. He then got the idea to just shoot into the water, thinking there were so many fish that the odds of hitting one was high. He was right. It didn't take long to hit one. By late afternoon, he had three fish on ice in the cooler.

We returned home, hot, sweaty, and stinking of fish. We all wanted a shower. Including Pretty Petite Girlfriend. So we all took showers. Then Pretty Petite Girlfriend went home. And Other Mom became furious. She informed Pretty Petite Girlfriend that showering at our house was inappropriate. She accused her and FDS of having sex. Apparently, Hubby and I allow a free-for-all in our home. As punishment, Pretty Petite Girlfriend cannot come into town to meet up somewhere with FDS for a month, and she is not allowed to go on family outings with us for a year. When I was informed of Other Mom's mandates, all I could do was shake my head.

I've been staying out of the whole Other Mom mess, but part of me feels like it's time to step up and let my voice be heard. I feel like Other Mom is making assumptions about me, Hubby, and FDS that are completely unfounded and even leaning towards being cruel and hurtful. I'm not sure how to go about making my voice heard, but with some thought, I'll figure it out.


Debbie said...

Without trying to be disrespectiful to the mother, she is one step away from losing her delightful, beautiful daughter by trying to control her every move. She is a good girl who doesn't need to be stiffled by this authoritarian parenting style. What a shame for the lovely girl. Yes, you may have to stick up for her to her mother's face one day as I believe it takes a village and this girl's sanity is actually in jeopardy. She is almost an adult who is being treated like a 4 year old. And, what I find interesting and frustrating, is that this girl appears to be a sweet, rule-following, non-trouble seeking young lady. She has never given her controlling mother a reason not to trust her and her judgement. Bless her heart.

Thryn said...

Invite her to join you to serve at a soup kitchen and then be nice as pie but kind of ignore her?

Have a local friend do a write up on how fabulous you are as a writer in a newspaper FDS has spotted being read at PPG's home?

Send Other mother an autographed copy of some of your work and a note about how delightful PPG is - that you have never before allowed FDS to know someone so well.

Smack her upside the head the first chance you get?! :) She's been a bit too much - even for being overprotective.

JK said...

I totally agree with you, Debbie. PPG is so sweet. I am so happy that FDS met her and is learning very early on what makes for a solid, happy relationship.

Thryn, thank you for all the ideas. I did LOL at the last one. She's a very educated woman, but her actions and words kind of make me stop and scratch my head. If nothing else, what she has been doing has allowed for me and FDS to have some really awesome conversations. He's a terrific kid.